<body> IN SEARCH OF THE MISSING ONE....
THE EMPTY ME.



alex.
twenty two.
25MARCH85.
SINGAPORE INSTITUTE OF MANAGEMENT.
LOVE SPORTS.

WISHLIST.

laptop
printer
Happiness
back pack
good grades
trip to Taiwan
basketball shoe
new sound system
a good badminton racket
full LIGAMENT recovery
creative mp3 - at least 8GB

HAD BEEN.

  • June 2004
  • July 2004
  • August 2004
  • September 2004
  • October 2004
  • January 2005
  • March 2005
  • August 2006
  • September 2006
  • November 2006
  • February 2007
  • March 2007
  • April 2007
  • May 2007
  • June 2007
  • July 2007
  • August 2007
  • October 2007
  • July 2008
  • September 2008
  • February 2009
  • March 2009
  • April 2009
  • June 2009
  • October 2009

    THANKS FOR BEING HERE.

    Eve
    Claris
    IBP.. =)
    AlvIn
    Linda
    Nui er
    Ah Ron
    Shevon
    DA JIE!

    YAK YAK.


    Sunday, March 25, 2007


    I jus came back from clubbing at MOS. Well in actual fact i am very awake and sober right now. awake till the fact that it seems so scary... if u all happen to see a show acted by rui.. erm no.. i mean yang jian hua.. lolz.. the title is "QIAN BEI BU ZUI"... it tell of how yang jian hua can nver get drunk no matter how much she drink... well.. i got a bit of this type of feeling... cause i really feel more and more sober everytime i club and drink... and that suck... I jus have so much feeling right now.. call it emo if u want but all these feeling is ever present in my life.. 24th march, the eve of my bday.. yet i dun feel like it at all.. this yr i started counting down to my bday only when there is like 10-12 day left... why? make no difference also... today wanted to meet some frens for dinner.. all seem not to know it is my bday 2moro.. well.. sad case.. nvm.. finally found someone, who is jackson.

    Well, jus a burger king dinner and we went over to kandi bar, where i had grasshopper and he had a "multiple orgasm" wah if real life orgasm taste like tat... i rather have to orgasm at all.. lolz..


    And then it was off to club.. yeah, a few of them wished mi happy bday.. but well.. i felt so so so out. guorong hit the nail in my heart when he ask.. why decide to club on ur bday, and with jus 1 fren? i jus had to say "alot of my fren in taiwan, and others not free... but 2moro still got a grp of fren celebrating for mi"


    1stly, i only have 2 fren in taiwan, and yes 2ndly others not free(or dun know is my bday) and 3rdly, the grp of fren is claris and rui. lolz! take a look at my frenster list... 537 fren... 166 testi... all feel so useless to mi... cause i dun even have fren i can ask out.. sometime i jus feel that i am such a loser.. my dad alway hit the rite nail when he say.. "i tot u got lot of fren.. why nver go out? why alway stay at home? why nver go out with ur frens?" i can only jus ans him.. "erm... i like to stay at home.. i tired... they busy... no need everytime meet... alll these shit.. but he is rite.. i got no frens...


    now to thankz those few who at least msg or wat... in order of merit...


    1) May... thankz May... it was nice workign with u last time, alway helping mi cover this and that.. and now 1st to mms mi somemore with ur own pic.. lolz... thankz thankz..


    1) SHAH! i put u number 1 also bcoz u msg mi at 12midnite zun! lolz... thankz bro.. we went thru a lot together.. so much secret.. so much studying together... so much having fun.. ping pong.. soccer.. sentosa.. gym... nycc... dinner.. lunch... helping with my com.. ur training... thankz thankz.. u r still 1 of the best bro i have and the best best malay bro i have!


    2) My dearest sis... haha.. oki although i alway scold u at home.. or bully u as u alway say but it is all for ur own good... kana bully by mi better den bullied outside by other ppl rite... hahah.. thankz thankz.. yeah and not u sleeping so soundly.. haha


    3) Claris! hahaha.. mrs rou ma.. thankz thankz.. i know u miss ur mr rou ma very much who is in taiwan now.. thankz a lot nice knowing u.. although u suck at bridge.. hahaha... see ya later!


    4) cindy.. haha.. my da lao po in poly... thankz thankz.. wah but every yr ur msg same de lehz.. jus sing a bday song in msg form to mi.. haha.. but well thankz a lot.. cause u remember.. see when u free come out k.. i know NUS busy and stress... haha


    5) Surprise Surprise!! my guai peiling!! lolz.. wah not bad ah nui er... haha.. really surprised that u text mi... well as i told u le.. u grow up le.. must interact with ppl more liao.. dun alway so zi bi.. i know u 2 yr plus liao can!! hahaha...


    6) siyong!! lolz.. ehz u purposely ask ur sister to test mi is it.. lolz.. well i am thankzful la.. u alway help mi so much... we still take part mix netball competition together in poly.. thankz ahz.. thankz for answeringmy question on SIM too.. xie xie!!


    7) kailiang.. u asshole.. i was expecting more than jus a text can... didnt even meet or wat... and u can tell mi even my bday have to book u in advance... this type of buddy... u can eat shit la... but well... still thankz for the msg...


    8) Vincent! lolz.. wah not bad ahz.. my workmate! but ass.. jerry dun come den u dun come liao.. ps mi.. haha.. later i go back make sure ur arm really break! lolz.. but thankz for wishing mi.. my bed buddy jerry didnt even msg mi.. haha... xie xie la.. mr pussy cat SOH.. lolz


    9) Si rui... hey girl.. thankz ah.. not sure if it is ur sister ask u to test mi out de or wat but still really very thankzful... haha.. really very happy to receive ur msg.. hehe... well i was clubbing la.. den when u msg mi jus nice i resting so i reply lo... ur sis msg mi when i was in the dance floor so i nver reply la... ask her dun jealous.. hehe...


    10) last but not least... my another nui er... Aileen!! hahahah... wah not bad ahz.. got msg mi.. guai guai.. lolz... my this long lost nui er ahz... but pull urself 2geter and forget abt all bad thing k.. and concentrate on ur study can le.. dun think abt those sad thing.. lao pa zi chi u!! hehe



    and so... that is those who msg mi for now.. not sure if there will be any later on... wah it is 6:08 liao... i meeting claris and rui 12pm at harbourfront... must wake up ard 10 plus.. hahah... but still i feel that is a need to blog how sucky i feel... in actual fact.. i feel this is my worse bday ever.. but well... almost every yr my bday suck... it oki.. maybe when i get the chance to go uni den i can get to know some true and more happening fren.. to all my fren.. i am really trying very hard already..


    rui and claris... hope later will be a wonderful outing... at least salvage some of my bday.. haha... see ya all later... take a lot a lot of pic ya!!! oh ya.. everyone!!! musical fountain of sentosa is closing!!! on the 26th of march!! so sad can... if can pls go catch it... the start of a lot of romance... i once told myself i wanna watch it with the someone special in my life but now it is closing down!!! damn.. sad can.. but well.. jus go and at least u will be able to reminisce it....

    ------------------给你的爱一直很安静..... 来交换你偶尔给的关心........---------------

    Alexelion MisSeD yOu @ 5:40 AM 

    Monday, March 19, 2007


    Yeah, back with a new post.. Well, yday went to gym and after that went to play bball... wow.. so so so so so long nver play liao den when i play really really felt damn exhausted!! In the end i guess i over exhausted myself and i ended up having a fever the whole nite.. till now i am stil feeling weak and feverish.. haiz.. must exercise more le.. cannot like tat... sucky feeling...

    Was browsing thru the newspaper today when i saw that the musical fountain in sentosa is gonna be closed down on 26th March... quite sad... the musical fountain to me is quite special.. i especially like the feeling it give mi and haha.. i had alway told myself.. one day i shall watch the musical fountain with someone special. now i haven even have that someone in my life and the musical fountain is closing down.. so sad man.. really very sad...

    Well... this is the month of March.. my bday month.. but also a lot of my fren having bday... let mi see got who.. anqi, ricky, may, sunil, mi, wyne, sha, xinhui, valerie, junli, selina, tay kah woon... etc... wah so many!! hahaha
    BUT OF COURSE THE MOST IMPT IS MY BDAY LA!!! muahahha jus kidding...

    but as i have said in previous post.. my best bro will all not be ard for my bday... quite sad.. but well.. lonely bday lo..

    Again i shall end with a story... hope it touches ur heart...

    Salty Coffee - very touching He met her on a party, she was so outstanding, many guys were chasing after her, while he was so normal, nobody paid attention to him.
    At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him. she was surprised, but as he was polite, she promised. They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to anything,
    She felt uncomfortable, she thought, "please, let me back home".

    Suddenly he asked the waiter: would you please give me some salt I'd like to put it in my coffee. Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red, but still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it. She asked him curiously: why you have this hobby?

    He replied: when I was a little boy, I was living near the sea, I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, salty and bite, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who are still living there. While saying that, tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched.

    That's his true feeling,from the bottom of his heart. A man who can tell out his homesick, he must be a man who loves cares about home, has responsibility of home.. Then she also started to speak, spoke about her far away hometown, her childhood, her family. That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story.

    They continued to date. She found actually he was a man who meets all her demands: he had tolerance,was kind hearted, warm, careful...he was such a good person but she almost missed him! Thanks to his salty coffee!

    Then the story was just like every beautiful love story: the princess married to the prince, then they were living the happy life... And, every time she made coffee for him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that's the way he liked it.

    After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said: " My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole life lie. This was the only lie I said to you----the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It was hard for me to change so I just went ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything.

    Now I'm dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth: I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste. But I have the salty coffee for my whole life since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, I still want to know you and have you for my whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again." Her tears made the letter totally wet.


    Someday, someone asked her: what's the taste of salty coffee?




    ..............it's sweet. She replied.......



    Melvin.. ur prediction nver come true after all... =(

    Alexelion MisSeD yOu @ 10:03 PM 

    Monday, March 05, 2007


    Suddenly jus felt like blogging... Finally had my new computer on sunday... power... i like...
    It is so damn nice the interface and all.. of course.. it couldnt take much off my mind abt the previous nite.. Thing were made worse when man u won liverpool in the most tyco tyco shit i had ever seen... lolz...

    Suddenly feel like blogging cause got some view wanna express... also dun know why...
    I feel that sometimes, human emotion is jus so had to control.. and at the least expected time, emotion tend to overcome you and it can result is dire situation. I dun wish myself to be like tat ever again but i know something jus cant be controlled.

    It wasnt abt dancing.. u know? =)

    Let mi share this story...

    A guy and a girl can be just friends... but at one point or another one of them will fall for the other, maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late or maybe,
    just maybe...forever....
    As I sat there in english class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called 'best friend'. I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it.

    After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before. I handed them to her. She said thanks' and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
    I want to tell her, I want her to know that I dont want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I dont know why.
    **************** 11th grade ****************
    The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine.
    After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep.
    She looked at me, said 'thanks' . I love her but I'm just too shy, and I dont know why.
    **************** Senior year ****************
    The day before prom she walked to my locker. "My date is sick" she said, he's not gonna go" well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together-just as 'best friends'. So we did.

    Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step. I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. Then she said- "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I dont want to be just friends but I'm just too shy.

    A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angle up on stage to get her diploma. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as i hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said-'you're my best friend, thanks' and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
    Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say 'i do' and drive off to her new life, married to another man.
    I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said 'you came!'. She said 'thanks' and kissed me on the cheek.
    Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my 'best friend'. At the service, they read diary entry she had wrote in her high school years.
    This is what it read:
    I stare at him wishing he was mine; but he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! 'I wish I did too...' I thought to my self, and i cried....
    ...........................REMINISCE OF A LOVE SONG......................

    Alexelion MisSeD yOu @ 9:51 PM 



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    Alexelion MisSeD yOu @ 8:40 PM 



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    Alexelion MisSeD yOu @ 8:35 PM 



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    Alexelion MisSeD yOu @ 8:32 PM 



    Wifey 3!!
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    Alexelion MisSeD yOu @ 8:29 PM 

    Sunday, March 04, 2007


    A bit Harsh....

    A bit Hurt

    A bit more of worrying u r angry

    Very much sorry

    =)

    Alexelion MisSeD yOu @ 10:09 PM 



    `No rights at all... PERIOD.



    Why did i go?


    =)

    Alexelion MisSeD yOu @ 3:53 AM